Remind Me Not to Get Old in Spartanburg

Apparently assisted living communities are dens of thieves! Here’s a tip for hiring people if you’re ever in that position – if they look like a greasy street walker or an amateur porn star you might want to keep them away from temptation. Also women who bounce checks and get caught on possession beefs will only pay off if lap dances are part of the job description.

No offense to the three dancers who read Greenville Dragnet, but c’mon, you guys know what I’m talking about:

The sad thing is that, if I understand this story right, the one with the raps sheet actually wasn’t the thief. Sorry Tammy, we’ll keep our eyes open for any positions you’re qualified for.

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